Not Built

We are not built for ourselves, but for God. Not for service for God, but for God.

-- Oswald Chambers

LETS GO BLUE!!!

Last day before dropping my son off to college...he and I enjoyed a day together.

Demise of Listening

The revolution in communication technology has caused the tragic demise of listening. Communication today is becoming increasingly a narcissistic obsession about being seen and heard.

The need to be heard is a basic human need. Listening is about acknowledging this need – it doesn’t mean agreeing to or endorsing the speaker’s views.

Listening is the foundation on which trust is built. People who listen without interrupting, dismissing or multitasking, are being respectful and showing they care about what the other person thinks. When practiced consistently, ‘being’ and ‘showing’ builds trust faster than ‘saying’.

A genuine listener asks questions before making up her mind whether to agree or disagree. Engaging a person in dialogue shows the other that you are curious to know more and are sincere in your efforts at understanding a different point of view before agreeing to or rejecting it. People can tell whether their viewpoint has been carefully considered before being rejected or just summarily dismissed. 

-- Aparna Muralidhar

That's Absurd

If at first the idea is not absurd, then there is no hope for it.

-- Albert Einstein

Defer hard-and-fast conclusions and pursue ideas...don't kill them off too quickly.

Why would we do such a thing anyway?  Perhaps more directly, why do we do this?  It strikes me that we often operate out of what feels like is at stake for us, out of what we need to defend or preserve in which we've got a lot invested (whether we realize what it is or not).  In other words, if 'this' isn't true or 'that' is true, then what does that say about me and what I've been saying or doing?  ...it is the operating version of our identity that is often 'on the line'...that stiffens us and tempts us to kill off ideas too quickly.

It's a survival strategy deeply engrained within us. ...not to mention that we tend to like things the way we've got things arranged in our minds.

The Measure

The measure of a life, after all, is not its duration, but its donation.

-- Corrie ten Boom

Enemy: Perfect

Perfect is the enemy of good.

-- Voltaire

Failing

Failure is, truly, inevitable. It’s what we do when it happens that matters. If there is a recipe for success, resolve figures in it. So does relentlessness, and at least a pinch of raw ability. But resilience, I think, is the main ingredient.

I had a poster on my dorm room wall in college of a man in a tuxedo, inexplicably wedged into an inner tube, floating in a pool. The caption read: “good judgment comes from experience, and experience comes from poor judgment.” This is certainly true to some extent. No matter how good the advice, we may have to live it to own it. My parents’ advice was among the best I’ve ever gotten, but to get it from head to heart where its cadence could help orchestrate the long, hard march to fulfillment required living it.

Failing is inevitable. Failing at failing is tempting. Succeeding is occasional, and generally hard-earned. Succeeding at succeeding is fun, and easy, if elusive. When it happens, ignore Kipling’s excessively curmudgeonly counsel, and take mine instead: enjoy every minute of it. But know that it will be fleeting, and it will not reflect the measure of you.

Succeeding at failing is the truest measure of us all.

-- David L. Katz

Off to College - #3

You will only see what you are prepared to see.

-- Ralph Waldo Emerson

We took our 3rd to college yesterday.  This is getting to be a habit!  We are glad for the opportunity for Makenzie to grow in this next stage of her life.  IWU is a good place and is committed to some very good ideals...including their vision, captured in part by Emerson above.

More pics here....

Ferguson: The Untold Story

...the media need to expand their understanding of their role in times of crisis. The media's job is to report not just all that's dreadful, corrupt, dysfunctional and violent in our world but what's working, and the powerful and humane ways people in communities respond to that violence and corruption and dysfunction.

The spirit on display in Ferguson -- as it was during Katrina -- is a glimpse not just of who we may become but of who we are right now. It's there, it's on display, and it's manifesting itself. And perhaps we would glimpse this side of ourselves more often if the media acknowledged it more often. It's not entirely absent, but too often it's relegated to the "hero" segment closing the local news, or to the Thanksgiving piece down at the local food bank.  Continue Reading....

-- Arianna Huffington

Seems important to note alternative points-of-view to the perspective of mainstream media...on both sides of the aisle, which appears to increasingly make money off of controversy.

Instinctive Responses

Though they have been trained upon us, we are betrayed by our most instinctive responses to our efforts to survive.

It seems we often end up choosing one of two things, increased or more creative effort or simple resignation...quitting.  Both leave us in an unsatisfied stupor, insensitive to another option sitting right beside us...almost as if it were simply waiting for us to see it.

What we have opportunity to discover is that our real source of survival is not rooted in the management of our own resources to begin with.  We do not give ourselves life.  Something else does....

So, what does make us come alive again...from our oft-exhausted state?  I am asking a group of guys I meet with this question.  I am asking it of myself.  I suspect it may be a most important question....

Comfort Zone

So it's searchable:

You can't be a world changer until you serve.  And you can't serve until you break free of your comfort zone.

-- Ann Voskamp

Faithless

Faithless is he that says farewell when the road darkens.

-- J.R.R. Tolkien

Pushing Boulders

A lot of life feels like pushing boulders...either uphill or to keep them from rolling downhill over you.  Either way, a whole lot of effort, rooted in a sense of survival.  I feel this physically now most mornings, at least initially.  But this weight spans others dimensions, into the societal, mental, emotional, and spiritual.

Too Small

Most of us have jobs that are too small for our spirits.

-- Studs Terkel

Actually Become

I know that the more I humble myself to others, the broader my understanding of God has actually become.

-- Francis Frangipane

This seems true, at a number of levels, for me today.

For example, this morning's ritual in the woods was truncated with an ankle sprain I am still wincing at.  After a few unexpected expletives, a huge 'WHY?!' also came tumbling out (note-to-self:  my deepest 'why's are usually connected to pain).  I was being so careful in my running, too, because I had done this very same thing just a couple of weeks ago.  After the recurring frustration, WHY presented itself in full view.  I limped home slowly...with more time than I had originally planned for, to consider things.

Pain invited another thought into my view.  Perhaps I tend to move too quickly these days...and this circumstance has afforded me an opportunity to slow me down.  What is faster getting me anyway?  How does faster affect those around me?  Is there something anti-humble going on, in the speed of my life?  I can think of a few examples of where my speed may not be experienced as humility by others.  God is not speedy, per se, with me -- though He certainly could be.  Why isn't He?  ...what is better about His slowness towards me?

And, what of that do I need to offer to others...humbly?

Lighthouse

Some really amazing lighthouse photos here....  And, another one from the same place of the picture above, by my friend, Dawn.

Reconnect

Disconnecting from technology so we can reconnect to ourselves is absolutely essential for wisdom.

-- Arianna Huffington

More and more support for this sense of things seems to be coming out every day, yet we appear to be as glued to our devices and what they represent to us as ever.  We must be afraid of missing something.  The irony is in what we may be missing in our desperate attempts to not miss out.

Perhaps we can start to war against this conventional wisdom, for the wisdom above, by practicing some of this each day.  The smallest of attempts (like #5) can go a long way towards new habits, which can ultimately lead us to a surprising level of freedom...and, perhaps, real wisdom.

Don't Ask

Don't ask yourself what the world needs.  Ask yourself what makes you come alive, and go do that, because what the world needs is people who have come alive.

-- Howard Thurman

The Arts

The arts aren't just important because they improve math scores.  They're important because they speak to parts of children's being which are otherwise untouched.

-- Sir Ken Robinson

Teaching Emotional Literacy in Schools

The children coming into their second grade classroom that morning arranged their chairs in a circle for a daily ritual: Their teacher asked every child to tell the class how they felt (unless they didn’t want to share this), and why they felt that way.

Naming emotions accurately helps children be clearer about what is going on inside – essential both to making clearheaded decisions and to managing emotions throughout life.

For instance, when children tune in to what engages them, they connect with the intrinsic motivation that drives them. If a child is just following the teacher’s goals for what she should learn and not thinking much about her own goals, she can develop an attitude that school is all about other people’s agendas – and fail to tap her inner reservoir of motivation and engagement. On the other hand, attuned teachers can use students’ interests to excite them.

In the school years, the equivalent is “good learning” – being engaged with what enthuses us and what feels important.  Continue reading here....

-- Daniel Goleman

Rather Be Ruined

We would rather be ruined than changed. We would rather die in our dread than climb the cross of the present and let our illusions die.

-- W.H. Auden

Mighty Little

Man knows mighty little, and may someday learn enough of his own ignorance to fall down and pray.

-- Henry Adams


We had a remarkable expression of God's work in the lives of our youth during church today.  I am thrilled to know, to watch, to participate in it.  Falling down in prayer seems like one of the most natural responses I can think of.

Beach Art

Click here for more amazing 'beach' art....

Lead From Behind

It is better to lead from behind and to put others in front, especially when you celebrate victory when nice things occur. You take the front line when there is danger. Then people will appreciate your leadership.

-- Nelson Mandela

Others

Leaders become great, not because of their power, but because of their ability to empower others.

-- John C Maxwell

The Difference

So it's searchable:

The difference between
    who you are and
  who you want to be
is what you do.

Code

Your code is the greatest weapon in your leadership arsenal. Having a clear code will help you keep perspective when you are doing well and will help you take the high ground in times of adversity. It will keep you honest. It will deter you from taking shortcuts or engaging in actions that don’t feel right.

-- Doug Conant

Unreasonable Assumption

The mythical image of a “leader” embodies many of the characteristics commonly found in personality disorders, such as narcissism and psychopathy as well as histrionic or Machiavellian personalities.

Today there are scorecards for virtually everything, including leadership development. However, the MIT study concludes, the use of metrics for the effectiveness of leadership development is leading them astray. Most metrics don’t measure the soft skills, or strategic thinking or collaborative behavior, all of which are essential for leadership success. Organizations tend to measure the things that are easy to measure. “The philosophy that dominates so many company cultures today is that initiatives that cannot be measured have no value. In most instances, that is a reasonable assumption. But it does not apply to leadership development.  Continue here....

-- Ray Williams

He Bends Down

I love the Lord because he hears my voice
    and my prayer for mercy.
  Because he bends down to listen,
    I will pray as long as I have breath!
 
-- Psalm 116:1-2

A group of youth from our church spent some time considering this verse while camping together this weekend. God is listening; are we talking to him? Why not?

7 Reasons Why Spending Time in Nature Does Wonders for the Soul

As we camp this week with a group of youth, here are few things worthy of notice:

1. There is no societal influence
2. It is a reminder that you are not infinite
3. It has a calming effect
4. There's always more to learn about our planet
5. It teaches us about living in harmony
6. It is a reminder that everything looks perfect from far away
7. It is a reminder that chaos is a part of life

These are the highlights.  The details on each are good too...click here.

Look Up