Most certainly a first world problem, I have a dilemma with donuts.
As I’ve observed some of the patterns in my life, I’ve noticed that nearly every time I have a doughnut for breakfast my total calorie intake for the day ends up much higher (not just because of that donut). There is probably a simple explanation.
Eating sugar makes me want to eat more sugar. Invariably, if I start things off with a donut, by the middle of the day – and then again in the evening – I am craving something sweet (again). If I can catch it, by recognizing it, I can redirect myself and end up just eating something else. However, even then, the eating-something-else strategy is still staring at me toward the end of the day. For whatever reason, it seems, my willpower to resist by the end of the day is rather low.
In simple tactical terms, it seems like the best thing I can do to try to head things off…is simply not eating a doughnut at the beginning of the day.
Here’s the thing, while wanting to avoid some of the more obvious consequences (weight gain, rising cholesterol, etc.) are sometimes yet effective, denial is a short-term tactic at best. Because on any subsequent day, I’m faced with the dilemma all over again.
So, this got me thinking — when do I address the situation in a completely different way? The day to day challenge is both tedious and wearisome. It feels like a waste of energy. And since, as I age, energy is moving up the scale for my attention, I’ve begun to consider what all else may be going on that I can work with more effectively.
I’ve been in several conversations over the years, and again lately, about the role of desire in our lives. What is it that we want? This almost inevitably leads to the next version of the question; which is, what is it that we really want? To be sure, there is a collective version of these questions. And, there is a highly personalized version, too — what do I really want?
We seem to be hardwired to want things. Many things influence what that is. Our DNA seems to set the default and then what we experience, especially in the earlier years of our lives, adds its weight to the shape of the things we want.
At this point in my life, I’ve noticed that overall health is higher on my list of things I want than it used to be. The earlier version of it was that I wanted to feel good. At that stage, wanting to feel good was often confined to things like food that tasted good. After a few too many experiences, where eating too much food that tasted good, I discovered that I often ended up not feeling good. So, then, I had to balance something out. The desire to feel good, but also to not feel bad.
After a few years of discovering this dynamic, I moved towards wanting to actually feel good, as opposed to simply enjoying things like what tasted good. And, so, it was somewhere along this point of the journey that I realized I needed to incorporate physical activity into my life intentionally because doing so made me feel good.
Fast forward a few more iterations, I got closer to the reality that while feeling good overall was important, there are other dimensions to being healthy that needed to be considered. So, now, I will actually eat things that, in my opinion, don’t taste particularly good simply because they are good for me — they contribute to my health.
I work out nearly every day now; mostly because I know it is good for me (not because I always feel like doing it). And, even as I work out, I vary things day to day because I know it is good for me to do it that way.
I do these things because of what I want. In other words, I want more than the quick savory hit I get from donuts. I still want them (and I still eat them). But, I want to be healthy even more. So, whatever combination of these things that I want works its way through what I do, I am subconsciously balancing multiple things that I want. In laymans terms, I want a doughnut. In theoretical terms, I want to be healthy. Somewhere in the middle, they meet.
So, at least for now, this is my working conclusion, I have faced a dilemma with donuts (OK, and ice cream…). But, the nature of that dilemma is shifting, even to the point where dilemma is a bit of an overstatement.

